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Why couldn't the sailors play cards?

Because the Captain was stood on the deck!

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

How can Ozzy Osbourne possibly sing that?

When Tony Iommi is standing right next to him, alive and well.

What does Diana stand for?

Dead In A Nasty Accident.

Captain Jokes More Captain Jokes

Why didn't the dog play cards on his ocean cruise?

Because the captain stood on the deck.

Why didn't the sailors play cards on the deck?

Because the captain was sitting on the top of the deck.

Sailor Jokes More Sailor Jokes

What's the difference between a soldier and a sailor?

Ever tried dipping a sailor in a boiled egg?

Why did the sailor ground his son?

His grades were below sea level