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Card Jokes

Why couldn't the pirate play cards?

Because he was sitting on the deck!

Birthday State of Mind

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Birthday State of Mind

What animal should you never play cards with?

A cheetah

Why does AMD call having 2 or more cards Crossfire?

Because no matter what card you cross, and how many, you're bound to start a fire.

Why didn't the sailors play cards on the deck?

Because the captain was sitting on the top of the deck.

What's your funniest yet least known joke?

I have a friend that absolutely loves cheesy, question and answer jokes and I wanna make a card with a list of them! The problem is that she knows just about every joke known to man so I challenge you to give me hilarious, short jokes that aren't very widely known. Make me laugh!

How can you get four suits for under $2.00?

Buy a deck of cards.

Why don't the zebra and the lion like to play cards in the prairie?

CAUSE THERE'S TOO MANY CHEETAHS!!!

Why is it so hard to play cards in the jungle?

There are too many cheetahs. Courtesy of the St. Louis Zoo Facebook page.

What does marriage have in common with a deck of cards?

In the beginning, you only need two hearts and a diamond. Later on, a club and a spade.

Who's there! Adelia! Adelia who?

Adelia the cards after you cut the pack!

Why didn't the dog play cards on his ocean cruise?

Because the captain stood on the deck.

$Your Age Is Only Math$

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Your Age Is Only Math

Why can't you play cards on a small boat?

Because someone is always sitting on the deck.

Which big cat should you never play cards with?

A cheetah!

Whats the worst animal to play cards with?

A Cheetah.

Why cant you play cards on a rowboat?

Because you're sitting on the deck...

Why don't elephants like playing cards in the jungle?

Because of all the cheetahs!

Who's there! Alligator! Alligator who?

Alligator for her birthday was a card!

What if I'm always just inexplicably shuffling a deck of cards?

Would you buy that Like "whoa, who's that drifter!"

Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

Because the captain was standing on the deck! Aargh

Where the hell did you get?

The barkeep asks. "I won it, playing cards", says the pig.

What kind of cards do donkeys send out near Christmas?

Mule-tide greetings.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

Why shouldn't you play cards in the jungle?

Too many cheetahs!

Why should you never play cards in the jungle?

Because of all the cheetahs

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Luck Jokes More Luck Jokes

Where can I find that "4 Out Of 5 People Get Money In Their Birthday Cards" Birthday Card?

I've been checking online with no luck, unless I'm checking the wrong place

What did the doctor say to the witch in hospital?

With any luck you'll be able to get up for a spell.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did God make women last?

He didn't want someone telling him what to do

Why would someone in jail want to catch the measles?

So he could break out.

Crossfire Jokes More Crossfire Jokes

Why does AMD call having 2 or more cards Crossfire?

Because no matter what card you cross, and how many, you're bound to start a fire.

Bind Jokes More Bind Jokes

How is Ducktape like the Force?

It has a Dark Side, a Light side and it binds everything the galaxy together. Edit:Duct Tape I know, I was tired

What did one end of the rope say to the other?

We were bound to get together...

Pirate Jokes More Pirate Jokes

How do pirates get their hair to stand up?

Sea-men. My brother told me that

What did the pirate tell his littler sister when she asked if she could hold his parrot?

ISIS

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

How Do Mexicans Play Basketball?

Juan on Juan.

What do Mexicans use with the Wii-U?

Amiigo

Type Jokes More Type Jokes

What are the three types of men?

The handsome the caring and the majority.

What type of clothing does a House wear?

Address.

Hot Pocket Jokes More Hot Pocket Jokes

What is the difference between wealth and poverty?

And the dad says: 'Wealth is caviar, champagne and women. Poverty is hot pocket, beer and your mother!'

What's the difference between an Nvidia card and an AMD card?

One empties your pocket. The other makes Hot Pockets.