Why did the old man buy his wig at the thrift store?

Because he didn't want toupee.

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Why did the groom want his bride to wear white?

He wanted his new dish washer to match his fridge.

What does DJ Kahled say when he wants another taco?

Another, Juan

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How do meth users get the money to buy their drugs?

The toothfairy.

Why do robbers steal money?

Me: So they can buy stuff. 4: Why don't they just steal the stuff She's a criminal mastermind.

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Why did the old man hate using the new chip cards?

He's trying to watch his sodium intake.

How do you find an old man in the dark?

It isn't hard.

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Why did the old man buy his wig at the thrift store?

Because he didn't want toupee.

How's your love life?

Well, I went on a date. 45 minutes in I realized it was a turtle in a wig. "I'm sorry man" it's ok. still got laid.