When a cop pulls you over and asks, "Papers?

Answer "Scissors." then drive away..

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Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

How did a blind woman pierce her ear?

Answering the stapler.

Which Kind Of Girls Wear Transparent Clothes?

"Those Girls Who Don't Trust The Imagination Power Of A Boy"

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?

I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

What's the hardest part of golf for asians?

Driving

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why didn't The Terminator upgrade to windows 10?

I asked him and he said, "I still love vista, baby!"

What happened when a ghost asked for a brandy at his local pub?

The landlord said "Sorry we don't serve spirits."

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

Why did the puppeteer get out of jail?

Because he "pulled a few strings"!

What does Mickey Mouse do to Minnie Mouse after she drowns and he pulls her out of the water?

Mouse to Mouse resuscitation.

Paper Jokes More Paper Jokes

What kind of root is only easy to find on paper?

A square one.*

Why couldn't the physicist get his paper published?

It was a work of friction.

Cop Jokes More Cop Jokes

Why do the cops monitor the store that sells upper-case letters for computers?

It's a shifty business.

What do you call it when two cops dance?

Pork Grinds

Scissor Jokes More Scissor Jokes

When a cop pulls you over and asks, "Papers?

Answer "Scissors." then drive away..

What does a lesbian pirate say?

Scissor me timbers!