What do the LAPD and computers have in common?

They can both burn C.D's

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

What has a slice of burnt toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common?

In both cases you wish you took it out a few seconds earlier.

What's the difference between a cigarette and my exwife?

Cigarettes don't scream when they're burning.

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

Which football team to you need to connect up your computer?

Leeds.

Why did the worker get fired from the hp computer factory?

He threw out all the computers with "dy" on them.