What do you call a bag that never approaches anything?

An asymp-tote*

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Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

What do you call a bag of tiny crosses?

Jesus Pieces.

Whenever we keep the money in the bags our son steals it, I don't know what to do?

Husband: Keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them....

Approach Jokes More Approach Jokes

What you hope someone might say about you when they approach your casket?

Hey, I think he moved.

Why did the Kurd bury his music collection?

His tribesman said "ISIL is approaching, and they're coming for Yazidis."