What do you call a bag that never approaches anything?

An asymp-tote*

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Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year-old child?

Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out of a 49th-story window!

What's the difference between a 4 year old boy and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

Approach Jokes More Approach Jokes

What you hope someone might say about you when they approach your casket?

Hey, I think he moved.

Why didn't the approaching black hole concern the astronaut?

He didn't understand the gravity of the situation.