Approach Jokes

Why didn't the approaching black hole concern the astronaut?

He didn't understand the gravity of the situation.

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How did Mars feel when the colonists were approaching?

Terra-fied.

What did the Buddhist monk say when he approached the hotdog stand?

Make me one with everything.

When she approached my car window I asked what's wrong officer?

She said "ugh nothing!"

Why is it the only thing a woman wants out of a man these days is security?

Well it's the first thing they say when I approach them.

What did the pair of flip-flops say to the approaching man with disgusting feet?

Shoe.

What do you call a bag that never approaches anything?

An asymp-tote*

What's the best angle to approach any challenge?

Try-Angle.

How do you approach an angry Welsh cheese?

Caerphilly.

What you hope someone might say about you when they approach your casket?

Hey, I think he moved.

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Where are things that are very average produced?

The satis-factory.

What was the last thing that Columbus said to his sailors before getting on the ship?

Okay men, get on the ship.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

How many Californians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Hella. How long does it take them Days.

Why was the calendar depressed?

His days were numbered.

Problem Jokes More Problem Jokes

Why did the young Mexican solve the problem so easily?

It was a no buena My girlfriend is Mexican so I love Mexican jokes. Let me know if you have one!

What do you call it when a lizard has problems in the bedroom?

A reptile dysfunction

Ugh Jokes More Ugh Jokes

What was the first joke ever written?

Ugh, Ugh Ugh? Uggh!

What did the Asian say when he saw a line at the local soup kitchen?

Ugh.... Pho queue...

Phuket Jokes More Phuket Jokes

What's your favorite city in Thailand?

Phuket, I don't know...

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

Which company saw the end of disco coming from a mile away?

Discover.

What is this world coming to?

Do their parents know they are outside, interacting, and getting exercise

Gorilla Jokes More Gorilla Jokes

What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?

You-Rang-a-Tang

What do you call a fight between a human and a gorilla?

A harumble.

Colonist Jokes More Colonist Jokes

How did Mars feel when the colonists were approaching?

Terra-fied.

How did King George view the colonists?

He thought they were revolting