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What do you call a boat that won't float?

Bloated.

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Float Jokes More Float Jokes

What do you call a personal laptop floating in the ocean?

A Dell - Rolling In The Deep

What did they find floating in the toilet of the S.S Enterprise?

Captains Log

Boat Jokes More Boat Jokes

Why did the boat dock with the all of the other boats?

Pier Pressure

Why are a lot of Italians named Tony?

Because as they got on the boat to leave Italy, they were stamped on the head, "TO NY".