What do you call someone who takes things literally?

A kleptomaniac!

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

When things go wrong, what can you always count on?

Your fingers.

What is the only thing that will be "Feeling the Bern"?

Working people's wallets.

Kleptomaniac Jokes More Kleptomaniac Jokes

Why can't you tell a pun to a kleptomaniac?

They take things literally.

Why can't you use sarcasm with a kleptomaniac?

Because they take things literally.