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Why can't you use sarcasm with a kleptomaniac?

Because they take things literally.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why does Bob Ross not use a condom?

Because he doesn't make mistakes, only happy little accidents.

What happens when the president of the United States has to use the bathroom?

The state of alert in the White House rises to Defecate 2.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What two things should people stop shaking because shaking hurts these things development?

Polaroid Integral Film and Babies

What's the only thing worse than a poop joke?

A corny poop joke. You can really visualize it.

Sarcasm Jokes More Sarcasm Jokes

Why do thieves have such a hard time understanding sarcasm?

They take things literally

Why do beaches not get sarcasm?

Because they always take things littorally

Kleptomaniac Jokes More Kleptomaniac Jokes

What do you call someone who takes everything literally?

A kleptomaniac!

Why don't kleptomaniacs ever get puns?

The take everything, literally.