Sarcasm Jokes

Who else have gone through this Sarcasm?

Me: Baby, I was thinking about you so sending you She: Thanks for Thinking

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Why do thieves have such a hard time understanding sarcasm?

They take things literally

Why can't you use sarcasm with a kleptomaniac?

Because they take things literally.

Why do beaches not get sarcasm?

Because they always take things littorally

What's the difference between sarcasm and a serious statement?

What're you asking me for I have Asperger's.

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Send Jokes More Send Jokes

How do long distance runners send e-mail?

On the sprin-ternet.

What do these shoes do?

GLINDA: Send you home D: Lame tries new pair And these G: Wait- D: clicks heels turns into hamburger

Pizza Jokes More Pizza Jokes

What did the Italian chef say when his boss tried to pick a fight?

You wanna pizza me!

What did one pizza tell the other pizza?

A cheesy pun.

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

What has 50 legs but cant walk?

Half a centipede!

What do you call two black guys on a white guy?

Half a sack

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why do they use liquid soap in the Navy?

It takes longer to pick up

How can you call someone and sound fabulous?

Use a homophone.

Dj Jokes More Dj Jokes

What does the DJ do when he spills acid?

He drops the base!

What did the carrot say to the DJ?

Lettuce Turnip The Beet

Understand Jokes More Understand Jokes

What did phenolphthalein do when he couldn't understand his Chemistry homework?

He just added Acetic Acid until it became clear.

What kind of bee can't be understood?

A mumble bee!

Kleptomaniac Jokes More Kleptomaniac Jokes

Why don't kleptomaniacs understand puns?

They always take things literally.

Why can't you tell jokes to kleptomaniacs?

Because they always take things, literally.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between prayer in church and prayer in a casino?

In a casino, you really mean it.

What's the difference between garbanzo beans and chickpeas?

I've never paid $200 to have a garbanzo bean in my mouth.