With a pair of Caesars...
The other half
Uranium gets to its half-life on time.
About six and a half books.
Half a cat.
Herr Kutz (This was funnier when I was half asleep this morning)
DJ Beazza Yes it's a stupid pun, but that's a good 50% of my humor, the other half being sarcasm.
Kenya West
A slightsabre
Finding a vein in a hot dog.
You look in the mirror and see what you saw. Take the saw and saw the table in half. Two half's make a whole, go through the hole.
Cause all their pants are half-off
Finding half of a roach in your food.
An abomination.
I, 4-1, know we won't win.
With ducktape!!
Half a cat
Half a dog
Half of them are lyin'.
5. The other half is 3.
Half of a worm in half of a cherry.
It rhymes when they say. "Keep at eye out for a coyote."
The radiush.
An asymptoad.
Pessimist Prime
Half a dog!
Half a centipede.
About half of them.
Because he kept giving half of what he owes.
Biting an apple and finding half a worm
He heard boys' pants were half off.
Half a centipede!
She wanted to lay it on the line.
2 chairs and a half of a fish.
A divorce, then she'll only have half of everything.
So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.
He wanted to lay it on the line!
Half-a-dog!
Biting into an apple and finding half a worm!
A oneba.
A mounted police officer
By folding it in half.
Because they only use half pipes.
It can look round.
Gifted!
They are hiring.
Six and a half books.
Because there was a 50% chance of rain
Pupil: Up and down or across Teacher: What do you mean Pupil: Well up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0!
Because two halves make a whole (hole) and you could lose your money.
To which his friend replies, "No, it's about four and a half feet."
He was forced to resort to excessive violins.
Cut it in half.
He always gets stuck on across.
Fold it in half!
Finding half a caterpillar in your apple
They take the senor discount.
Half a measure.
Australia. Because five $0.20 coins are about half a pound.
He was selling In-Security Heh yeah i dunno i thought it up in a dream and I'm still half asleep bye
With a seesaw
A denom-nom-nominator!
Because he couldn't see that well!
Cos they like to walk around in their bear feet.
I Expectsum Patronum
Because it means urine trouble
Two. One to hold the ladder and one to screw your mother - I mean light bulb!
She turned it over and used the other side.
A senpairate.
Because yeasterday he died and tomorrow he will have risen.
Do their parents know they are outside, interacting, and getting exercise
Ask them to pronounce "LATEX"
Put an apple on your head & stand still he'll Tell you.
When the (w)hole job's done.
It makes it possible for them to go from hole to hole with an iron in their hands.
Finding a baby in two trashcans.
You have to love Easter, baby." (OC)
Sleep late.
Because he was hooked on worms.
