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What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot?

Half a cat.

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2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

What do you get when you put a number 1 and a number 2 on your calculator?

A huge mess.

How are a full count in baseball and a mutated 2 time convict the same?

They both have 3 balls and 2 strikes.

2 Leg Jokes More 2 Leg Jokes

What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot?

Half a cat.

What do you call rice on 2 legs?

Pi Ok, I'm leaving now.

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

What do you have to know to be a real estate salesman?

Lots.

How many bricks do you need to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two, but you're going to need a lot of patience and light bulbs.

Bleed Jokes More Bleed Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a tree?

Trees don't bleed when you cut their limbs off.

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

What do you call something that is half horse and half pig?

A mounted police officer

Why can't Zeno seem to pay his bar tab in full?

Because he kept giving half of what he owes.

Half Cat Jokes More Half Cat Jokes

What has 2 legs and bleeds profusely?

Half a cat

What has two legs and can't stand up?

Half a cat