What's the only thing worse than finding a roach in your food?

Finding half of a roach in your food.

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Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Where do you find a quadriplegic?

There where you left him.

How do you find a blind man in a nudist camp?

It's not hard.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What do you call a lawmaker in a society ruled by horses that says one thing but does the opposite?

A hippocratic hypocrite.

What kind of bees hum and drop things?

A fumble bee!

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

Why should you never trust advice from a group of gryphons?

Half of them are lyin'.

What are you doing with that saw and where's your little brother?

Young Monster: Hee hee! He's my half-brother now!

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

Why do they thank me in the cafeteria when I pay for my food like I had a choice?

Just tell me "enjoy the diarrhea" and I'll move along.

What do you call a small dog that can store food?

Pupperware

Roach Jokes More Roach Jokes

Why would atomic weapons be useless against Turkish rebels?

Because roaches can survive nuclear radiation.

What did the roach say after a series of disappointing hotel stays?

This is my last resort.