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Why shouldn't you carry two half dollars in your pocket?

Because two halves make a whole (hole) and you could lose your money.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What do you call a guy who likes to lose?

Ewan

What's the difference between my GoPro and my girlfriend?

I wouldn't spend hours looking for my girlfriend at a ski resort if I lost her on the mountain.

Hole Jokes More Hole Jokes

Is there a hole in your shoe?

No… Then how’d you get your foot in it?

What do you call a big white bear with a hole in his middle?

A polo bear!

Carry Jokes More Carry Jokes

How does an elephant climb a tree?

He hides in an acorn and waits for a bird to carry him up.

How many Polish people does it take to be pallbearers at a funeral?

Seven. Six to carry the casket and one to drag the body

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What's the smallest amount of money you would reach into a toilet to get?

Mine is a skittle.

How do Rabbis make money?

They keep the tips.

Pocket Jokes More Pocket Jokes

Why did the bald man cut a hole in his pocket?

He wanted to run his fingers through his hair.

Why did the bald guy cut a hole in his pocket?

Because he wanted to run his fingers through his hair.

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

What's got two legs and bleeds?

Half a dog Derek, s01e05

What's half of 8?

5. The other half is 3.