When one points and asks his friend, "Is that statue a foot?

To which his friend replies, "No, it's about four and a half feet."

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Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why was Gollum executed at a bar in Iraq?

Because he asked for Ice-es

What was Arnold Schwarzenegger's answer when asked which historical person he would like to play in a movie?

I'll be Bach.

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

What made you go out on that dangerous pond ice and risk your life to save a friend?

Boy Hero: I had to do it. He had my skates on.

What did Little Bo Peep say to Woody when she got caught screwing Buzz?

You got a friend in me.

Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

Why do frogs have webbed feet?

To stamp out forest fires!

What do you call an atheist in a six foot pine box?

All dressed up, with no place to go.

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road half-way?

She wanted to lay it on the line.

What has two legs and can't stand up?

Half a cat

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

Why am I getting my Christmas presents in August?

Her mom replies, "Because it's cheaper than chemotherapy."

What's your favourite priest and a rabbi joke?

Been awhile since I've her some priest and a rabbi jokes. Hit me with your best one! Mine: a priest and a rabbi are waking down the street The priest asks " wanna screw some kids?" The rabbi replies "out if what?"

Statue Jokes More Statue Jokes

What has four legs but doesn't move?

A statue of a dog!

What does the torch represent in the hand of the Statue of Liberty?

The torch is a symbol of her inability to read in the dark.