What did the one fish in the tank say to the other?

Do you know how to drive this thing

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know a presidential candidate is lying?

Their lips are moving.

What's the difference between your finger and a hammer?

I don't know! Well you're not using my computer keyboard then!

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What was the last thing that went through the hostages head?

A bullet.

What's the last thing you want to hear from a surgeon dissecting someone?

Oops

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

How do you drive this thing?

Two soldiers are in a tank. One turns to the other and says "GLUGGLUGBLUGBWOOABB"

What do driving and dating have in common?

Both end up with you being chased by the police if you go too fast.

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

What has got 8 legs and 1 eye?

2 chairs and a half of a fish.

What did the fish say when it crashed into a wall?

Damn! (This is my go-to joke that someone told me in highschool like 7 years ago. Felt like sharing it.)

Tank Jokes More Tank Jokes

Whats so good about german cars?

They get from Berlin to Warsaw in one tank

What do you call a tank rolling through the streets of poland?

Ghetto Blaster