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When things go wrong, what can you always count on?

Your fingers.

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

How strict is the "I licked it, it's mine" policy?

There's some things I've licked that I don't want.

What is one of the first things that Adam and Eve did after they were kicked out?

A. They really raised Cain.

Count Jokes More Count Jokes

How does The Terminator lose weight?

By counting Kylereese.

What's the difference between a 100 year old and a 4 year old?

What base you're counting in.

Finger Jokes More Finger Jokes

How do you celebrate July 4th in Canada?

Not by getting drunk and blowing off your fingers, because it's just a regular day fir you.

Why did the vampire stand at the bus stop with his finger up his nose?

He was a ghoulsnif fer.