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What do you get when you buy a $5 umbrella?

Wet.

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Where does an octopus go to buy shoes?

Inke

Why shouldn't you buy shoes off the street?

They might be laced with something..

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Why does Snoop Dawg carry an umbrella?

Fo drizzle

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella?

For drizzle.

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Why should you never mention the number 288?

Because it's two gross! (A gross is a measurement unit for "144". So 2 * 144 = 288. Or "two gross".)

What do you get when you buy a $5 umbrella?

Wet.