23+ Funny Source Jokes - Curious Supply

Why should you never mention the number 288?

Because it's two gross! (A gross is a measurement unit for "144". So 2 * 144 = 288. Or "two gross".)

What did the circus owner say to the human-cannonball when the he wanted to retire?

How will I ever find another performer of your caliber? (Source: a dad on Thanksgiving)

What do you call a crowd-sourced internet database for turntables?

Wiki-Wiki-Wikipedia

What two places can you find a California roll?

Sushi bars and stop signs.

Why does Neville Longbottom like herbology so much?

Because his parents are vegetables.

Whats the difference between a genie and a genius?

A genie grants wishes, while a genius wishes for grants.

Why was 11 afraid of 12?

Because 12 13 14!

How do you hold a pirate rabbit?

With its buccaneers!

What do you get when you buy a $5 umbrella?

Wet.

Where did Sally go during the explosion?

Everywhere!

Why did Dracula's mother give him cough syrup?

Because Dracula was coffin. Source: A Laffy Taffy wrapper.

What would Santa Claus be called if he had no hands?

Canta Plaus.

What do you get when you cross a leopard and a camel?

A fireside rug you can get a good hump on.

Why do chickens sit on eggs?

Because they don't have any chairs. Source: my five-year-old.

How should I respond?

Source: http://qr.ae/xUchD

What is the difference between leaves and a car?

One you brush and rake, the other you rush and brake.

How can you tell someone is an engineer?

They'll tell you! (Source: am an engineer)

What do we call a wireless mouse?

Hamster.

How do I know he was French, do you ask?

He went oui, oui.

Source Jokes