What is the difference between leaves and a car?

One you brush and rake, the other you rush and brake.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Tim Howard and Jesus?

Jesus had 11 guys he could depend on.

What's the difference between God and an electrician?

God doesn't think **he's** an electrician.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What do you call a government official that can't leave an airport because of a blizzard?

Edward Snowed In

What is Mario's favorite search browser?

YYYYAAAAHHHHHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I will leave now)

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car?

Because she's dead.

Why didn't the LoL champ care when she crashed her car?

Because it was Elise

Http Jokes More Http Jokes

What is the difference between leaves and a car?

One you brush and rake, the other you rush and brake.

What is recursion?

What is recursion (http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/211omr/whatisrecursion/)

Brush Jokes More Brush Jokes

How can you tell an old person from a young person?

An old person can sing and brush their teeth at the same time.

What can you sit on, sleep on, and brush your teeth with?

A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush.

Brake Jokes More Brake Jokes

How did the lawyer chip his tooth?

The ambulance slammed on its brakes.

What did Kurtis Blow tell his son when teaching him how to drive?

THESE are the brakes!

Source Jokes More Source Jokes

What did the circus owner say to the human-cannonball when the he wanted to retire?

How will I ever find another performer of your caliber? (Source: a dad on Thanksgiving)

What is the difference between leaves and a car?

One you brush and rake, the other you rush and brake.

Rake Jokes More Rake Jokes

What's Sideshow Bobs least favorite creepypasta?

The Rake.

What do you call a charming tool?

A rake

Rush Jokes More Rush Jokes

Why are you always rushing out of here after work?

You're single with no kids." Me: " Exactly."

Why was Homer Simpson in such a rush to get to the Kwik-E-Mart?

He desperately needed Apu.