What do you think you're doing driving through that intersection fifty miles an hour?

Driver: My brakes don't work so I was rushing home before I had an accident.

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why was the little black kid with diarrhea crying?

Because he thought he was melting.

Why did the lady stare at the orange juice?

Because she thought it was telling her to concentrate!

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What's black and does not work?

Decaf Coffee

Why did Boba Fett work alone?

Because he was hunting Solo.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

How do you know when you are too drunk to drive?

When you swerve to miss a tree and then realise it was your air freshener..

What did Matthew McConaughey yell at the drive that was about to miss his turn?

A right a right a right!

Mile Jokes More Mile Jokes

Which company saw the end of disco coming from a mile away?

Discover.

Whats green and can jump a mile a minute?

A frog with hiccups!

Driver Jokes More Driver Jokes

What's an empty suit of armor doing on the drivers side of a car?

He went out for the knight. OK I'll leave now

Why did nVidia build the first self-driving car?

Because their drivers keep crashing.

Accident Jokes More Accident Jokes

What is it called when a ninja flees the scene of an accident?

Hidden Run.

How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?

Be too drunk to find your keys.

Brake Jokes More Brake Jokes

What do you think you're doing driving through that intersection fifty miles an hour?

Driver: My brakes don't work so I was rushing home before I had an accident.

What do you call a cab driver who lost his brakes?

A screwdriver

Rush Jokes More Rush Jokes

Why was Homer Simpson in such a rush to get to the Kwik-E-Mart?

He desperately needed Apu.

What is the difference between leaves and a car?

One you brush and rake, the other you rush and brake.

Intersection Jokes More Intersection Jokes

What do you think you're doing driving through that intersection fifty miles an hour?

Driver: My brakes don't work so I was rushing home before I had an accident.

How does a blond cross the road?

A brunette is on a busy street across from a department store she needs to visit, and is looking for an intersection to cross over when she spots a blonde walking out of the store. The brunette waves and calls out over the traffic noise, "hey there! How do I get to the other side?" The blonde looks confused and calls back, "you ARE on the other side!"