What does a fish say when he hits concr...

What do u call a Mexican who survives a shootout and lives to tell the tale?

The Juan who lived.

However, a man goes home and tells his wife about it. How is this possible?

He wasn't single.

What's joke #1?

THIS IS NOT A JOKE I'm sure you all have heard the joke where has a number for each joke and that everyone just remembers the numbers instead for typing out the jokes. This always made me think "What would joke #1 be?" What do you think it'd be?

What do you call an octopus that loves jokes?

A knock-knocktopus.

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

What do you call an arcade game that involves you hitting avocados that pop out of the top of it?

Guac-A-Mole.

What should a teacher take if he's run down?

The number of the car that hit him.

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

What did fish on the kitchen bench say to the other fish?

Long time no sea.

What do sea monsters have for dinner?

Fish and ships.

Shirt Jokes More Shirt Jokes

What's the difference between a wealthy man wearing a tux and riding a bike and a hobo in torn jeans and shirt riding a unicycle?

Attire.

What does it say on the door of the Microsoft store?

No shirt, no shoes, no Surface.

Dam Jokes More Dam Jokes

Why was the beaver homeless?

He just couldn't give a dam.

How much wood does a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck chuck could chuck wood?

None because only beavers give a dam.

Customer Jokes More Customer Jokes

What did the German baker say to greet his customers?

Gluten tag!

What did the shoe say about the customer who didn't like that it had yellow shoestring?

That's lacist.

Rule Jokes More Rule Jokes

What did the sign say?

Grandkids: No children in shopping cart :((Me: Rules are rules.

Who would rule in a dog world?

The pawlice.

Concrete Jokes More Concrete Jokes

What does a fish say when he hits concrete?

Dam! A customer told me that joke, equipped with an " old guys rule" shirt and a hardy fist bump.

What did David Crockett say when he looked over the Alamo wall and saw 3000 Mexicans?

Hey I didn't know we were pouring concrete today.

Old Guy Jokes More Old Guy Jokes

What do you call an empty cheese whiz jar?

Cheese Was! some old guy came up to me on the street and told me this one.

What does a fish say when he hits concrete?

Dam! A customer told me that joke, equipped with an " old guys rule" shirt and a hardy fist bump.