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What does a toddler get drunk off of?

Jack Danimals!

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What do you call it?

God: A toddler.

What's the difference between Gabe Newell and a toddler?

A toddler can count past two...

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Which playing card can turn its hand to everything?

Jack of all Spades

What do you get when einstein jacks off?

A stroke of genius!!!!! (its terrible, i know)