Toddler Jokes

What breaks when you give it to a toddler?

Their hips.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

$19.99

What do you call an army of toddlers?

Infantry.

What's the difference between Gabe Newell and a toddler?

A toddler can count past two...

What does a toddler get drunk off of?

Jack Danimals!

Why do parents send their toddlers to the army for daycare?

Because they're sending them to the infantry!

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a toddler?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.

What do a 14 year old and an open bucket of bleach have in common?

For twenty bucks either'll take care of your toddler. -&y (yup, mine)

What does a quantum physicist tell their toddler who keeps asking "Why" over and over?

Because I saw so.

What is the difference between a bag of cocaine and a toddler?

Eric Clapton won't let a bag of cocaine fall out of the window.

What do you call toddlers who are dictators?

Dictator Tots

What do you call it?

God: A toddler.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

$19.99

You might also enjoy:

Paddle Pool Jokes More Paddle Pool Jokes

What's the difference between a paddling pool and a swimming pool?

Deep ends really.

Paddle Jokes More Paddle Jokes

What do you call paddling down a river of skim milk?

White water rafting.

What's the difference between a paddling pool and a swimming pool?

Deep ends really.

Eric Clapton Jokes More Eric Clapton Jokes

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year old?

Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out a window

What is the difference between a bag of cocaine and a four year old?

Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out the window

Cry Jokes More Cry Jokes

What makes a grown man cry?

Watching his wife and children die before his eyes.

What's the difference between an accordion and an onion?

No one cries when you cut up an accordion

Pool Jokes More Pool Jokes

What happened to the skunk who failed his swimming lesson?

He stank to the bottom of the pool!

What do you call a depressed dog swimming in a pool?

A watermeloncollie.

Daycare Jokes More Daycare Jokes

Why do parents send their toddlers to the army for daycare?

Because they're sending them to the infantry!

How do you get Cream of Mushroom in Pokemon?

Put 2 Amoonguss' in the daycare.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What do you call a fallen tree in a forest?

Natural log. Sorry about the math joke.

Why did Sally fall of the swingset?

She had no arms. BONUS JOKE: Knock Knock. Who's there Not Sally.

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

How do you process a queue of table delete requests for an asynchronous database?

Pop, Lock & Drop It

What's the best part about dating a homeless chick?

You can drop her off anywhere