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Jack Jokes

What's the worst thing to say to a friend you see on a plane?

Hi Jack!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Why was the Jack-o-Lantern afraid to cross the road?

He had no guts!

What does the pirates 5 trailer and the iPhone 7 have in common?

There's no jack

Why is Rose sad?

Because there is no Jack in iPhone 7.

Why did Tim Cook fire an unpaid intern lately?

His name was Jack

Why was Jack scared?

Because Jack was bean stalked

Why does ACDC prefer Android to Apple?

She's Got The Jack

Why did Apple employee get away jacking off in the office?

Because there are no windows!

What did Samsung say to Apple?

You don't no jack!

Which playing card can turn its hand to everything?

Jack of all Spades

Where's the best place to buy jive cheese?

Monterey, Jack!

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Who you must not greet on a plane?

HI Jack!

How did Jack get rich?

His bean-stock went up.

What do Winnie the Pooh and Jack the Ripper have in common?

The same middle name.

How did Jack grow his portfolio?

He invested in beanstocks!

What happens when Jack is angry with his beans?

Jack and the beans talk

What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson with the Karate Kid?

Jacks on Jacks off

What does a toddler get drunk off of?

Jack Danimals!

Why did Jack get a restraining order?

Beanstalking.

What do you call a rabbit who lifts weights?

A jacked rabbit.

How did Jack know exactly where to find the goose in the giant's castle?

He had her.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

Whats an iPhone 7's favorite brand of frozen pizza?

Not Jack's.

Who sleeps at the bottom of the sea?

Jack the kipper!

What did the jack say to the car?

Can I give you a lift

What do Apple and Rose have in common?

They both lost jack.

What happened to the Guns 'n Roses tour bus when it got a flat tire and had to be jacked up?

Its axle rose.

What did the thief say when he saw the man leave his coat behind?

Let's jack it.

Why didn't Rose get an iPhone 7?

She never let go, Jack.

Why did Jack cross the road?

Because he was bean stalked.....

What's wrong with the sentence "Jack and Jill is playing in the field?

Women should be first.

Why did the pirate have trouble with the alphabet?

Because his 'I' was all jacked up.

Love Card

Love Card

What did Apply say to the iPhone 7?

Hit the road, Jack.

What do you call a man with a car on his head?

Jack

Why Was Jill upest about the new iphone?

Because there was no jack.

What did terrorist say to my friend Jack?

Hi Jack!

What does Rupert the Bear and Jack the Ripper have in common?

Same middle name!

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Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

Why doesn't anyone ever add Paul Walker on Xbox?

He spends all of his time on the dashboard.

What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

Gut Jokes More Gut Jokes

Why didn't the skeleton ask out the Zombie to go to the Halloween party?

He didn't have the guts

Why do people hesitate before registering as an organ donor?

It takes guts.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why couldn't Handel play his harpsichord?

Because it was baroquen.

Where is the worst place to play hide and seek in a hospital?

In the I.C.U.

Tech Jokes More Tech Jokes

How many IT support techs does it take to change a lightbulb?

Have you tried turning the light off and back on?

What do you call the tech. at the vets who has to give injections to cats?

Claude.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why is it important to have plenty of help when changing a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.

What do you say when someone hands you a nice, ripe blunt in Germany?

Danke

China Jokes More China Jokes

Why do Chinese tourists get disappointed when they visit America?

Because when they buy souvenirs they find out they were made in China.

What's the name of China's new atmosphere-cleanup program?

The Desolation of Smog.

Spade Jokes More Spade Jokes

Which playing card can turn its hand to everything?

Jack of all Spades

How do you stop a monster digging up your garden?

Take his spade away.

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

Why are there no guys named William serving in the army?

Because they dislike the phrase "Fire at Will"

Why did the actor fire his Gorilla agent?

The big Ape kept wanting to take more than a 10% bite!