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What does it take to be a president of Russia?

Be a Viktor, then you are Devinitely In

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Why did Edward miss his flight out of Russia?

Because he was Snowden.

Why didn't Russia return the NSA whistleblower to the United States?

He was Snowden.

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What will Kayne West's political leaning be if he runs for President?

West wing

What do you call a foreign born communist running for President?

Ted Cruz