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What does it take to be a president of Russia?

Be a Viktor, then you are Devinitely In

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What do chicken, beef and Russia have in common?

They are all against Turkey

What does it take to make Mother Russia pregnant?

A soviet seamen

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Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

What do Lewinsky, Monroe, and Reddit have in common?

They all went down on a President.