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What does the funeral director say to the 11am service goers?

Mournin'

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What did the funeral director do with Alan Turing's dead body?

He encrypted it

Why did the funeral director cover his mouth?

He kept coffin

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What 11 letter word does every Yale graduate spell incorrectly?

I n c o r r e c t l y

Why didn't the blond call 911?

She couldn't find the 11 on the dial pad.