What famous American filmmaker lived in a safe?

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American Jokes More American Jokes

What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

Why did the American spend an entire winter in a Russian hotel?

They say he was snowed in.

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What did Patrick Stewart say when he was given a tortoise for his birthday?

Please, take it back. I don't like getting attached to animals. Especially when they only live 100 years.

Why don't hipsters live in Alaska?

Everything is cool there already.