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What have I got in my hands?

A double decker bus! You looked!

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

How are lawyers and apples similar?

They both look good hanging from a tree

How are black people and apples similar?

They both look good hanging from trees

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why do you hold your hand flat above your eyes when you look into the distance?

Because when you would cover your eyes with your hand, you wouldn't see sh*t. I'm lame.

What's the difference between a nail, a screw, and a bolt?

A girl raises her hand and says, "I don't know. I've never been bolted before."

Double Decker Bus Jokes More Double Decker Bus Jokes

What have I got in my hands?

A double decker bus! You looked!

What do you call a man with a double decker bus on his head?

The deceased!