What kind of underwear does Severus Snape wear?

Always.

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What kind of vehicle swerved to miss a talking lizard in the road?

Dodged-a-Rango

What kind of snake is it good to have on a car?

Windshield vipers.

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Why didn't the egg break?

Because it was wearing underwear.

What brand of underwear did Jesus wear?

Fruit of the Womb