What's the best part of divorce?

Two Kwanzaas

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What's the best part about abortions?

They never get old

What's the best part of living in Alabama?

You don't live in Mississippi.

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What do you call someone whose filed bankruptcy 4 times and divorced twice?

A GOP Presidential candidate.

Why so glum Chum?

Asked the kindly stranger. "If my parents get divorced...will they still be brother and sister "