What sort of violin does a ghost play?

A dreadivarius.

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What is atheism?

A non-prophet religion Edit: Replace the word "religion" with "set of beliefs" if you're picky about that sort of thing

What sort of perfume do snakes prefer?

Poison by Christian Dior!

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What's the difference between a cello and a violin?

A cello burns longer.

Why should you never hit people with violins?

Because violins is not the answer...