What time was it?

A quarter to three.

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What do you call a 20 year old spaceship that whines all the time and never wants to run properly?

The Millenial Falcon.

What's red and invisible at the same time?

No tomatoes.

Quarter Jokes More Quarter Jokes

Why couldn't the pirate use the bubblegum vending machine?

Because there is no quarter for the wicked.

What goes into the mouth of a quarter horse?

Two bits!