Because there is no quarter for the wicked.
Cuz he always uses a straw, man!
Because everyone uses the Internet to look up phone numbers or people don't have landlines anymore and cell phone numbers aren't listed in the phone book. Also people use social media to communicate and connect with people.
RRRRRRRRRRRRRgh
The pirate replies, "Arrr it's drivin me nuts!"
A humburger.
A quarter to three.
