Quarter Jokes

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?

I want my quarter back!

Why did the football coach go to Aldi?

To get his quarter back!

How do you know when the Moon is going broke?

When it's down to it's last quarter.

What do you call an anorexic with thrush?

A quarter pounder with cheese

How many quarters does it take to play the Lord of the rings pinball game?

None, it only takes Tolkiens

What is the difference?

What its the difference between a quarter and a guy? Neither gets had when you want tail

What do you call an anorexic blonde with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese!

What denomination are the coins in Super Mario Bros?

They're dollar coins, because a quarter is two bits, which means a dollar is 8 bits.

What is McDonald's demolition service called?

Quarter pounder.

What time was it?

A quarter to three.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What do you get if you cross a bee with a quarter of a pound of ground beef?

A humburger.

What does an American call a Canadian Dollar?

A quarter.

Why couldn't the pirate use the bubblegum vending machine?

Because there is no quarter for the wicked.

Why are you begging for a quarter?

Beggar: I didn't think someone like you would give me a dollar.

What do you call an Ethiopian with a piece of cheese on his head?

Quarter pounder with cheese!

What is that behind your ear?

Nice try, too old for the coin trick" "No it's a tumor" "Oh my god" "Kidding it's a quarter"

What do you call an anorexic chick with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese

What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it?

Money's tight these days!

How did Chad Kroeger lose a quarter?

Everyone who bought his tickets wanted their nickelback

What's the difference between a blonde and a phone booth?

A1: You need a quarter to use the phone.

Why is the moon like a dollar?

It has four quarters.

How is your mom just like a laundromat?

For a dollar in quarters she will take my load.

What is Meghan Trainor's favorite instrument?

A double quarter pounder with cheese.

What goes into the mouth of a quarter horse?

Two bits!

What do u call an anorexic women with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese.

Why did the football player tackle the phone booth?

To get his quarter back!

How much does he give the cashier?

2 dollars, so he gets a quarter back.

Why couldn't Led Zeppelin play pinball?

They had No Quarter

Why didn't the quarter roll down the hill with the nickle?

Because it had more cents

What's my rating from 1 to 10 for Harry Potter?

Nine and three quarters.

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2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

What is a oreo?

2 gang members smashing a white boys face.

How's the meal?

Me: I dunno. Let me check *pulls out phone Me: Not good. It only got 2 likes on Instagram Waiter: ...

Football Coach Jokes More Football Coach Jokes

Why did the football coach call his quarterback a hairdresser?

Because he missed a split-end on a curl.

Why did the football coach return to the bank?

To get his quarterback.

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

What do you mean you were really drunk?

I already changed my Facebook relationship status for you.

What does AF mean?

After Flossing. Now go brush your teeth and they will be clean AF. Why do you ask 10: Mom said you were lazy AF.

Ethiopian Jokes More Ethiopian Jokes

What do you call an ethiopian with buck teeth?

A rake.

What is the world's fastest land animal?

The Ethiopian chicken

Tolkien Jokes More Tolkien Jokes

What did the LOTR fan say to the LOTR hater?

What are you Tolkien about...

What did C.S. Lewis say about The Lord of the Rings books?

I don't know what you're Tolkien about!" Yeah, sorry.. I know it's dumb.

Tail Jokes More Tail Jokes

Why did the blind man swing his seeing eye dog around by the tail?

He was taking a look around

What place of business helps dogs who have lost their tails?

A retail store.

Whichever Jokes More Whichever Jokes

How Do You Tell 2 Scottsmen Apart?

You lift their kilts, and whichever one has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!!

Which do you think I should take?

Whichever you'll excel in, son.

Lord Jokes More Lord Jokes

What is white and streaks across the sky at blinding speeds?

The coming of the lord

What's White &amp Gooey and Rains Down From the Sky?

The coming of the Lord.