April Sale - 20% Off

How can you tell the clan of a Scotsman?

Look under his kilt, if it's a quarter-pounder, he's a McDonald.

Previous Random Joke Next
Look Jokes More Look Jokes

How many kids do you think Wolverine has?

Because a vasectomy would heal in seconds and he doesn't look like he'd wear a rubber or pull out.

How do you tell an introvert and an extrovert mathematician apart?

When talking to you, the extrovert mathematician looks at *your* shoes.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What food can tell you if a girl is pregnant?

Chickpea

What's the difference between organized crime and the government?

Only one of them is organized. Couldn't help but post this. Went to see a former mafia boss today, and that joke was told leading up to him speaking.

Scotsman Jokes More Scotsman Jokes

What did the Scotsman say when he ripped his trousers?

Och noo, me troosers!

Which language does a drunk Scotsman speak?

X-post /r/puns Scotch.

Mcdonald Jokes More Mcdonald Jokes

What do you call a holy man who works at McDonald's?

A Friar

Whopper?

McDonalds responded by introducing a 3/5ths pounder.

Quarter Pounder Jokes More Quarter Pounder Jokes

What is McDonald's demolition service called?

Quarter pounder.

What do you call a dead baby with a yeast infection?

A quarter pounder with cheese.

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

How can you tell the clan of a Scotsman?

Look under his kilt, if it's a quarter-pounder, he's a McDonald.

What did the Scottish man do when he ran out of pants to wear?

He kilt himself

Clan Jokes More Clan Jokes

How can you tell what clan a Scottish man is from?

Look under his kilt and if he has a quarter pounder then he is a McDonald.

What's Imperial Britain's favorite game?

Clash of Clans