What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it?

Money's tight these days!

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Stick Jokes More Stick Jokes

Why did Tigger get stuck in the toilet?

He was looking for pooh.

How do you turn a duck into a popular soul singer?

Stick it in microwave and turn it on until it's Bill Withers.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

Finally realized why my plant sits around doing nothing all day...

He loves his pot.

What time of day is it in France right now?

Mourning

Quarter Jokes More Quarter Jokes

Why did the football coach go to Aldi?

To get his quarter back!

What is McDonald's demolition service called?

Quarter pounder.