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Where is the best place to buy computer software?

Washington C.D

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What do you call a law enforcement agency that refuses to buy it's own vehicles?

The pro-lease department

Why don't you buy Ukrainian underwear?

Because cher-nob'll fall out

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Where's the best place to find a dog with no legs?

Where you left it

Where's the best place to apologise to someone?

Surrey.

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Why do The Walking Dead survivors try to get to washington D.C.?

Because it's their Michonne.

Why was Joe disappointed when he read the newspaper in Washington?

There were no jokes in the Post.