Why do Buddhists always buy 1 ply toilet paper?

Because they like to get in touch with their inner self.

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Where do programmers like to hangout?

The Foo Bar.

What gift would you like to receive during the St. Valentine's Day?

Well, I don't know" she answers shyly. "OK, that I give you another year to think about it..."

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What is up with 1, 3, 5, 7, 9?

I can't even...

What are you gonna argue about with your family this Thanksgiving?

1. Minimum wage 2. Police reform 3. Why are there raisins in this, Louise

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Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund?

Because he wanted to... "Get along little doggy"

What's the most emotional computer you can buy?

A Dell.

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Why can a T-Rex not touch his toes?

Because he's extinct

Why did the hipster chemist get burnt?

He touched the beaker before it was cool.

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Why can't Buddhists vacuum under the couch?

Because they have no attachments.

Why did the buddhist refuse novocaine when he went to get a tooth pulled?

He wanted to transcend dental medication.