Why are magicians always sad?

Because everything they have disappears

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What did the hippopotamus do to the magician?

He hippo-tized him!

How many magicians does it take to pull a rabbit out of a hat?

One. It's a trick question.

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Where are the posters?

WIFE: THEY JUST DISAPPEARED! In other room *cat is furiously stuffing missing dog posters into paper shredder*

How do magicians retire?

They seem to just disappear.