Why can't my girlfriend perform at open mic night?

Because she's a cover thief.

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Perform Jokes More Perform Jokes

Why won't A Flock of Seagulls perform in the Middle East?

Iran so far away

What do you call a fish that performs brain surgeries?

A neurosturgeon

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What's the best way to break up with your girlfriend?

On the front page of reddit.

What do you say to your girlfriend with two black eyes?

Nothing. You already told her twice.