Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippy?

He was too far out, man.

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Save Jokes More Save Jokes

What made you go out on that dangerous pond ice and risk your life to save a friend?

Boy Hero: I had to do it. He had my skates on.

What can save a dying blonde?

Hair transplants.

Lifeguard Jokes More Lifeguard Jokes

What do you get when you cross a computer with a lifeguard?

A screensaver.

How did your first day as a lifeguard go?

Me: "Amazingly well, thanks. Everyone was so friendly and waving at me."