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Why did Harry Potter buy so many golden snitches?

Because they were only a quideach

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Why was Lindsay Lohan feeling sleepy?

He was buying drinks.

Why do you never buy a woman a watch?

Because there's a clock on the stove.

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What did Harry Potter say when he fell down the hill?

Ouch! I Hermione!

Why is Harry Potter so popular in prison?

Because he catches all the snitches!