Why did the python return his pants?

They were too constricting.

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What kind of pants does Mario wear?

Denim Denim. Denim

What did the pirate say after his first-mate stuck the wheel in his pants?

ARGHH! You're driving me nuts!

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What are OJ Simpson's favorite keys on a computer?

Return Home Slash Slash Backslash Shift Shift Shift Escape

What do you get Devin Hester for Christmas??

Nothing - he'll just return it!

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Why did the python do national service?

He was coiled up!

Why did the bodybuilder go to the vet?

Because his pythons were sick