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What do you call presents after you've opened them?

Pasts

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Present Jokes More Present Jokes

What did the bald man exclaim when he received a comb for a present?

Gee, I'll never part with it!

How did SkyMall go bankrupt?

I bought all my wife's birthday presents there before she left me.

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

What do you call a man who opens the car door for you?

A chauffeur.

Which program do Jedis use to open PDF files?

Adobe Wan Kenobi.

Past Jokes More Past Jokes

What do you call presents after you've opened them?

Pasts

What do you mean I can't change the past?

Logs on to Wikipedia*