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Past Jokes

Why are there so many women archaeologists?

Because women love digging up the past.

$Your Age Is Only Math$

Your Age Is Only Math

Why are there so many Redditor archeologists?

Because loves digging up the past.

What was the ancient language Link needed a book to translate in "A Link to the Past"?

Hyruleglyphics.

What do you call a crocodile/robot sent from the future to save the past?

Termigator (Jesus Christ this one's even worse than the last)

What do you call presents after you've opened them?

Pasts

Why weren't you at work last week?

Me: Why are you living in the past

Why do so many girls do archaeology degrees?

Because they love digging up the past.

What do you mean I can't change the past?

Logs on to Wikipedia*

Why are there so many women archeologists?

Because they love digging up the past.

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Love Jokes More Love Jokes

How do you know Sia is Scottish?

Because she loves sheep thrills! *shows self out

Why could Luke and Leia never be together?

They went looking for love in Alderaan places.

Explain Jokes More Explain Jokes

How many times does a woman laugh after you tell her a joke?

Three. When you tell it to her, then when you explain it to her, and then when she gets it.

What did Peyton Manning said to his younger brother about the new NFL rule?

ELI5 (explain me like I am five)

Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

What did Eminem learn to defend himself?

Marshall arts.

What was the last thing a blonde heard before dying of old age?

"Today children we will learn our ABC's"

Sunny Day Jokes More Sunny Day Jokes

What do we call of spill of the world's most abundant resource?

A sunny day.

What do you mean he's your half son?

What do you mean what do I mean?" replied the man. He went on to explain "My son has half my genes, that makes him my half-son." The woman he was talking to decided he was crazy and without replying walked past him. She looked back and noticed his neck was red, after all it was a sunny day.

Sleep Pill Jokes More Sleep Pill Jokes

Why did the old man sneak past the cupboard?

He didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills.

Why should you be quiet in a pharmacy?

In case you wake the sleeping pills!

Decide Jokes More Decide Jokes

Why the plus or minus on the pregnancy test, ept?

How about a simple yes or no and we'll decide if that's positive or negative.

Why did Jared decide to gain all of his weight back?

The mall is hiring new Santas.

Fish Market Jokes More Fish Market Jokes

What would the blind man say every morning when he walked past the fish market?

Good morning, ladies!

What did the blind man say when he arrived at the fish market?

Hello, ladies.

Sneak Jokes More Sneak Jokes

Why does an elephant wear sneakers?

So that he can sneak up on mice!

What do you call a lycanthrope you've snuck up on?

An unaware wolf.