Walk Jokes

What do you mean what do I mean?" replied the man. He went on to explain "My son has half my genes, that makes him my half-son." The woman he was talking to decided he was crazy and without replying walked past him. She looked back and noticed his neck was red, after all it was a sunny day.

What do you call a fly with no wings?

A walk.

What do you call a radio that walks?

A walkie talkie.

Why does Juan walk around the school like he owns the place?

Because his dad built it and his mom cleans it

How many "a man walks into a bar" jokes does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, but you can be sure a whole Reddit community will appear to expand the joke, make it funnier and eventually run it into the ground.

What did the blind man say when he walked past the fish market?

Is this a tumblr meetup?

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How do you get in the 'Public Urination Club'?

Walk up to the nearest police officer and you're in.

What did the doctor say to the man who walked off the roof of his house?

I don't think you understand the gravity of the situation.

What do you call a deaf Pokémon go player walking into traffic?

Anything you want they're not going to hear you.

Who do you call about stray cats walking around your yard?

Brian Setzer

What does have eyes but can't see, has legs but can't walk, and has wings but can't fly?

A dead bird.

What does Aerosmith say when someone asks them for directions?

Walk this way

Why do people who drink milk struggle to walk?

Because they lactose.

What do we do now?

He said never mind we'll walk.

What has two eyes but can't see, two wings but can't fly, and two legs but can't walk?

A dead bird.

What does Mr. T say when he walks into a buffet?

I pity the full!

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What did the pirate say when he walked into the brothel?

Arggg! thar she blows

Why do you want to run for President?

Because walking wouldn't burn enough calories.

What do you tell a metal head who's walking on an icy street?

Slip not.

What does Reddit and Dating have in common?

It wastes your time and you walk away with either tears or a slight chuckle.

What does an elderly composer use as a walking aide?

A Zimmer frame

What did the blind man say when he walked by the fish market?

Good morning ladies.

Why did the man get kicked out of the "Russian" bar?

Because he walked in.

What do The Walking Dead and Fast & Furious have in common?

Dead walkers

What did the blindman say when he walked by the fish market?

Helllllllloooooo (insert your mother's/wife's/sister's/grandmother's name here.)

How do you walk a chicken on a leash?

You pullet.

How many more times will I watch "A Walk To Remember" tonight?

As Mandy Moore times as I want to.

What did the blind man say when he walked into the fish market?

Good morniiiiiiing ladies!

How do you walk out of a Casino with $1 Million?

Walk in with $2 Million.

What does Fozzie the Bear do when he can't find a ride?

Walk-a Walk-a

What's the most common activity people do while wearing safety vests?

Reflect! I use this dadjoke on my pregnant wife every day when she goes out for walks after dark and wears a safety vest.. 'Now honey, don't forget to reflect on all sorts of things, especially car headlights!'

Which joke has the maximum HOT Nuns in it?

You don't know none.. And here to learn one.. So when you are with your friends.. Or walking with your son.. Tell them reddit jokes.. thinking now they would listen... (to you) play it cool, play it slow.. No need to blow.. Take this further, take this far.. till sang by a star. (Improvise it as you like, don't care about the grammar. No rapper does.)

What did Mick Jagger say when he walked in on Hugh Hefner in bed with Dennis Weaver?

He said "Hey Hey Hugh Hugh Get Off Of McCould"

What Nationality was Otzi the Caveman?

He wasn't Italian, because he carried work tools, he wasn't Austrian, since he had some brains, he might have been Swiss, since he was outrun by a glacier, but most probably he was a German, because nobody else ever walks in sandals in the mountains.

Why did Snake walk into the bar?

Because he wears an eyepatch and has poor depth perception.

How do you find the Pun Bar?

You just walk into it

What do you get if you walk under a cow?

A pat on the head.

What did the English man say when he walked in on his wife making love to three men?

Ello, 'ello, 'ello!

What do you do with an elephant with three balls?

Walk him and pitch to the rhino.

What did the blind man say when he walked past the fish store?

Hello, ladies

What did the cowboy say as he walked into a German car garage?

Audi

Why a fruit doesn't walk?

Because fruit flies

What did the doctor say to the strange beer that walked into his clinic?

What ails you?

Why did the junkie walk into the pet store?

To buy some quack croakaine!

What do The Walking Dead and the Fast and Furious series have in common?

They both have dead walkers.

What's better than winning a gold medal in the quadriplegic (crippled) Olympics?

Walking.

What's his name?

A man walks into a bedroom and sees a hot, naked woman lying face-down on the bed. Q: What's his name? A: Willie Turner Q: What's name? A: Betty Will

What do you say to Simba if he's walking too slow?

Mufasa.

How does Harry Potter travel about?

Walking -Jk Rolling

Which dinosaur walks with a limp?

A Myfeetasaur

What is the difference between walking a dog in America and China?

The spelling.

How many retweets to let me take your sister to prom?

A student walks up to his friend a week before prom and asks, "Hey, how many Twitter retweets do i have to get to take your sister to prom?" His friend says, "Dude, she was abducted! She's been missing 3 weeks, you know this!" The student says, "So you're saying if i find her, i can take her?"

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Why do birds fly to the tropics in winter?

What is Harry potters favorite way to get down a hill?

Why did the chicken walk into the bar?

Whats Harry Potters favourite way of getting down a hill?

What the difference between a nun in a bathtub & a nurse in the bathtub?

What do you call a sleep walking nun?

How did Harry Potter get down the hill?

Love

What's the problem when your wife walks out of the kitchen?

What did the baby otter say when it walked into the club?

What's it called when Batman walks out of church?

Why do they call it the Xbox360?

What do you mean he's your half son?