Ketchup Jokes

Why is ketchup married to mustard?

Cause ketchup accidentally broke the condiment.

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What happens when you run away from tomatos?

They ketchup.

What is Walter White's favourite brand of ketchup?

Heinz-enburg.

What happens when you mix mustard and ketchup together?

It's must-up..

What did the bun say to the hot dog?

I relish the fact that you've mustard the will to ketchup to me!

Why did the mayonnaise win the running race?

Because the tomato sauce couldn't Ketchup.

What did the mother tomato tell the baby tomato when the baby tomato was walking too slow?

Honey, walk faster, KETCHUP!

Why is PC the mustard race?

Because consoles can't ketchup.

What do you call pasta with ketchup?

Spaghetto Ba-dum tss.

What do you tell a slow tomato?

What Ketchup

What is the question most frequently asked by a philosopher?

Would you like ketchup with your chips

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What kind of baseball do burgers play?

Ketchup baseball!

Why did the chip chase the sauce?

To ketchup Edit: I'm sorry

Why don't I have a boyfriend?

God: I sent you one, you dumped him for putting ketchup on his steak. Me: Ah. That's right. Gross.

What do you call a drawing of Ketchup?

Sketchup

What does Ramen and Ketchup taste like together?

Poverty.

Why are your eyes covered in ketchup?

I'm often asked by people: "Why are your eyes covered in ketchup " So I tell them it's because Heinz sight is 20/20.

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Mustard Jokes More Mustard Jokes

Why did the drill instructor squirt condiments on his trainees in the morning?

That's how he mustard the troops.

What do you call a singing bottle of mustard?

Celine Dijon

Pasta Jokes More Pasta Jokes

What's a masochist's favorite type of pasta?

Smacaroni

Why should you never trust a noodle?

Because they're in-pastas.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

Why do rabbits prefer IPA's over other kinds of beers?

Because they use extra hops

What kind of ears do trains have?

Engineers (engine ears).

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What did the barber say to the Potato?

You've got eyes on the back of your head!

What happens when skin touches skin, hair touches hair, and Balls Disappear?

You Blink Your Eyes.

Mix Jokes More Mix Jokes

What do you get when you mix tea and a dogs name?

A dinosaur! Ha ha get it Tea-rex...

What do u get when u mix a douche and a tool?

Scottsdale.

Mayonnaise Jokes More Mayonnaise Jokes

What's the difference between a jar of mayonnaise and France?

If you leave the jar alone for 200 years it'll develop a culture.

What do you call a jar of mayonnaise stuck in quicksand?

Sinko de mayo

Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What does a conspiracy theorist say when he breaks up with someone?

I think we should start seeing other sheeple.

Why was the Windows PC broke?

It ran out of cache.

Console Jokes More Console Jokes

What does a Maple leaf fan do when they win the cup?

Turn off their console and go to sleep.

What's the difference between a PC gamer and a console player?

One spends 400 dollars on a console that will play games for years, the other pays 400 dollars for a graphics card that will be outdated in a week