Why would my wife ask if I was wearing this shirt when it's already on?

Stop talking in secret code.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's the Difference between a Wife and an Attic Door?

An attic door can shut up. im going to hell

What do my wife and a chest freezer have in common?

The exterior is hot, but its cold as ice inside.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?

3.99 a minute.

How can you tell if an engineer is an extrovert?

They look at YOUR shoes when they talk to you.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did you stop your car get out and yell "coward" at the traffic signal?

Motorist: The light just turned yellow.

What did the tree say to the mountain?

Stop peaking at me.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How does a mathematician ask for money?

Give me 10! dollars

What will they ask Jared of Subway in the prison shower?

Do you want a 6 or a 12 inch one?' I heard this joke on Bill Burr's podcast.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why do accountants get excited on Saturdays?

They can wear casual clothes to work

What do retards wear on their heads?

Handicaps

Shirt Jokes More Shirt Jokes

What's a rappers shirt made out of?

Strait out of cotton

Why did the scale not wear any of his shirts?

Because they all had a tare